About the Author

Ted Peterson

Ted Peterson

Ted Peterson is a video game designer and screenwriter. With his partner of eight years, Peterson fostered and then adopted a little boy, Mikey, who turned 4 in September. Peterson is also working on his first novel.

  • Family Guyd: Snackless In Paris

    April 25, 2013, 7:59 p.m.
    The basic goal in raising a child is to try to create a self-sustaining creature. As a parent, you protect your kid in order that he might live long enough to be able to protect himself. Of course, to a certain class of parent, this protectiveness becomes an issue in itself, and we laugh at [&hellip
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  • Family Guyd: Candy Everybody Wants

    Oct. 15, 2012, 4:46 a.m.
    My son turned four last month, and it took two weeks to open all the gifts, one to three presents a day. It’s a tradition we’ve had since his first birthday with us, when he turned two and our friends’ generosity was so overwhelming that we had to institute that policy. It seemed to work. As [&hellip
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  • Family Guyd: Four Candles

    Aug. 15, 2012, 6:16 p.m.
    I don’t mind getting older, but the only people who are really excited about it are kids. Our soon-to-be four-year-old son is still at the age where you get better every year you’re alive. I pointed out how strong he was, and he said, “I’ll be even stronger when I’m five in kindergarten!” “Yes,” I [&hellip
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  • Family Guyd: So You Think You Can Parent?

    July 19, 2012, 7:30 p.m.
      Some parts of parenting aren’t tricky. You shouldn’t spank. You should play with your kids. You should kiss their boo-boos. You should listen to their stories. You should tell them not to pick their nose or grab their teachers’ boobies. The harder lessons to teach are the ones that take awhile – how to [&hellip
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  • Family Guyd: A Course In Food

    June 28, 2012, 11:11 p.m.
    It’s summertime. I know this because I looked at my calendar yesterday and saw “Mikey’s Hawaiian Luau Popluck Summer Kickoff” listed for today. This is the preschool potluck for which I have to make a main dish. I could have made a side dish or, better yet, a beverage, which would have required no work [&hellip
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  • Family Guyd: Disney & The Parent Trap, Part 2

    June 13, 2012, 2:39 p.m.
    Last week, I described my antagonistic relationship with California’s number one attraction. No, not Napa, Venice Beach, Yosemite, Hollywood, the Golden Gate bridge, or even the agent who convinced the world that Ryan Seacrest possesses any kind of charm or charisma. I’m talking about Disneyland. Despite my dislike for the idea of the place, I [&hellip
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  • Family Guyd: Disney & The Parent Trap, Part 1

    June 5, 2012, 2:38 p.m.
    A lot of grown-ups go to Disneyland without kids. I am not one of them. In my days as a singleton and in my days married-without-kids, if you gave me 300 dollars and six hours to spend as I liked, Anaheim and the Happiest Place On Earth would not enter the picture, not even a [&hellip
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  • Family Guyd: Certifiable

    May 12, 2012, 10:09 p.m.
    If you’re a straight couple, and you had your first kid in your twenties or thirties, and he or she wants a brother or sister, and you’re down with that, you have a process you have to follow. I’m not saying it’s always easy to have sex when you’ve already got a kid, but if [&hellip
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